Warung Tegal, or Warteg for short, is an Indonesian culinary institution serving various imaginable dishes, from the humble crisp fried egg to the elaborate smoked stingray curry. Finding warteg is easy. Navigating your way into the realm of this food service is not as simple. Just like sushi or tapas bar in other part of the world, surviving warteg can give you not only gastronomical satisfaction, but also a chance to better understanding of a culture.

First thing first: Dine in or take away?

All warteg came with take away service on the same counter as for dine in. Normally you will be greeted by the counter attendance, mostly likely female. Since there may be more than 3 persons behind the counter, the one serving you is the one made eye contact with you and greet you directly with the question “Makan Mas?” (Eat, Sir?). This is to sign whether you want to be served for dine-in or take away. For take away service, the answer should be “Bungkus” (literally means “wrapped”). For dine-in, just nod or answer with a simple “ya” (yes). Then your adventure may begin.

How to order?

The attendance will take a plate (or rice wrapping paper for take away) and fill it with portion of steamed rice. Beware, some warteg will not stop loading rice to your plate until you say stop. It is normal to see that the amount of rice loaded is amazingly generous. It is so generous that it seems like you may have no more space on your plate for other than rice.

The side-dish, it’s actually a sacrilege to call other cooking as “side-dish”, will be put on the same plate, on top of the rice. Everything other than rice and vegetables will be called “fish”, even for the vegetarian type like Tempe or tofu.

Order your vegetable and “fish” by pointing to the container, or mentioned the name if you know them. Normally I would start with a kind of stir fried vegetable, like papaya flower or carrot and cucumber curry. Then always try their “Orek Tempe”. This is Tempe cut into small pieces, deep fried and seasoned with sweet-savory coating and peanuts (and sometime deep fried anchovy-like fish). This is the signature dish of warteg. It was served per portion (one or two scoops). Then you may go for the real “fish”. It could be chicken, beef, innards, or seafood. Some warteg serves variety of seafood as warteg is initiated in Tegal, a small coastal town at the north shore of Java. Squid, cuttlefish, stingray are common dishes. Warteg style stir fried orange clams is also something notable. It is considered normal to choose two veggies, but choose only one type of “fish”. Ordering two or more “fish” to go with your rice is a waste and you will receive that silent eye-roll treatment for being a showing off rich dude. Don’t worry, you can always ask for another “fish” after you finish your first order, given that there is some rice left on your plate. To give you a "pro" warteg vibes, ask the attendance to add various gravy -just the gravy- from chicken curry, chili fish, or kecap-based meat stew to your rice to add more flavor. It's free. But don't overdo it. 2 types of gravy is acceptable.

Variation may be added by taking, or asking for, fritters. Please make sure that only savory fritter goes with your rice. It could be Tempe, tofu (filled or blank version), shrimp, corn, or vegetable fritter. Banana, sweet potato, or cassava fritter are considered as snacks, not to be eaten with rice.

To complete your order, ask for a dab of sambal (chili relish) on the side. Take your deliciously packed plate to the table where spoon and fork are available. The attendance may ask you to order a drink. Normally no beverages menu available, but you can always order hot tea (jasmine, with or without sugar), iced tea (with or without sugar), orange juice (if no other info given, then it's always with ice), or warm orange juice (pro-tips: if you're not sure, go for iced-tea no sugar). Another option is to take bottled beverages from the fridge, if any. Try Teh Botol, or Teh Pucuk for cheaper option. Mind you, it's very sweet.

Enjoy your meal!

Enjoy your food, drinks normally served a few minutes later. You can take kerupuk (crackers) available on your table or take banana that were hung above your table. Please remember that it is common to share table with strangers. You may also find that there are toilet rolls on the table. It is normal! You can use it to wipe your spoon or clean your finger. In most Indonesian household, we use water in toilet, not toilet paper. So toilet roll by default is just another form of tissue paper, not toiletries.

To finish your ultimate warteg experience, payment can be made by coming directly to cashier counter. Don’t ask for bills. Tell the cashier (the lady with calculator) what you have had. That should include the drink and the amount of kerupuk or banana that you take on the table (pro tips: to ensure that you didn't forget anything you had, take a picture of your plate before you start eating). No tipping were necessary, and compliment to the chef should be directed to the cashier. Most likely, she is the owner, or the daughter of the owner of the establishment.